Oberon is Here: Flash Fiction Challenge from Chuck Wendig's Blog
This is my post in response to a flash fiction challenge that I read recently on another blog. It's the blog that I've mentioned before that's written by Chuck Wendig. You can see that blog post for the challenge here.
the challenge was to write a piece that was less that 1,000 words using a picture that was provided by someone else as inspiration. I went with the original picture that was provided by the blog's author.
So without further ado - here's the picture and the story.
Oberon is Here
by Kyle Morgan
Twerking(from Wikipedia) - a type of dancing in which an individual, usually a female, dances to music in a sexually provocative manner involving thrusting hip movements and a low squatting stance.
Oberon, who's real name was Aloysius Mcgillicutty, had grown tired of his new life years ago. Once it was found that his twerking ability could cause anyone who witnessed it to achieve an enlightened state of mind he had no choice but to go on a never ending tour of the world and thereby create world peace.
It had all started that night at the bar in Columbus, Ohio. The bar had just received it's shipment of Oberon - a beer that was produced in Michigan and was pretty good. He and a couple of his friends (boys and girls) were out celebrating the fact that it was Thursday night.
|The beer in question.|
Eventually the group started to dance. Most of the girls left their drinks on the table while the guys not wanting to appear un-masculine while dancing held their beers in their hands.
Young Aloysius was just starting to have trouble counting how many beers that he'd consumed on two hands when the girls decided to have a twerking contest. Many of the girls in their group lined up, including young Lisa McMasters whom Aloysius had recently been crushing on.
The drunken group started to collectively loose its mind - the girls with their provocative dancing and the guys with the absurd posturing and cat-calls.
It was about that time that young Aloysius's alcohol fueled brain had a thought. Girls always like a young man who can make them laugh right so he should do something funny in order to stand out and attract the attention of young Lisa McMasters.
Aloysius calmly placed his beer upon a nearby table and indicated that he needed additional room for the amazing dance move the he was about to perform. His friends obligingly moved out of the way as he turned, bent over, and twerked.
When he stood up and looked around at his friends they were all staring at him in stunned disbelief. What a terrible idea, he thought. I've made a complete fool of myself. He reached over to grab his bottle of Oberon and took a swig making no attempt to hide his disappointment. When he had dropped the bottle from his lips he noticed, to his horror that his friends and a few other club patrons were still staring at him. If he had been less drunk it would have been fairly obvious that theirs was a look of reverence.
Lisa, the object of young Aloysius's affections at the time took him by the arm and lead him over to the elevated platform where the DJ stood playing the club's music. She told Aloysius that he must do that dance again for the betterment of all. He couldn't tell why she was talking so strangely but he did as she asked. Any kind of attention from Lisa was the kind of attention that he wanted.
The dj had a similar reaction to the group of friends and after another moment he stopped the music and brought Aloysius up onto the stage beside him. The dj started some music, at a much lower volume than before, and indicated for Aloysius to start dancing.
Aloysius looked at the lovely eyes of young Lisa and didn't want to disappoint her so he started to twerk. Everyone who was in that club that night achieved another level of consciousness. They no longer felt fear, anger, or worry. It wasn't long before Aloysius was traveling the globe at the behest of hundreds of sponsors to try and get his performance, that only worked live, in front of every person on the globe.
Humanity placed a colony on the moon within nineteen months of that fateful night in the bar. Within several years piece had been achieved in every previously violent region of on the planet. Aloysius, known as Oberon had two children with his wife the former Lisa McMasters, and they still traveled the globe trying to give his gift to every single person on the planet.
The biggest downside to all of this was that, for some unknown reason, there was no way for the Oberon Twerk (as it had come to be called) to work on Aloysius. Lisa was however always patient with him. He didn't know if she loved him or if she just wanted to keep him happy for the betterment of all mankind. As he stepped off of his tour bus she kissed him deeply and passionately. The only reason he questioned her love was his own insecurity. She had never given him reason to doubt.
He hated twerking but it was likely that many people who had to do the same thing everyday hated that thing - that is until they saw his thing.
He was rich, had a beautiful wife and everyone else on the planet was blissfully happy. Sure it was kind of like the reverse of a Zombie apocalypse, with him the last remnant of humanity's former inglorious society, but it was kind of nice.